Your condition, medications, and libedo....

 

      Hello Snobrdgrl!

          We had just touched this subject a few weeks ago, so you might want to do a quick search on it as well.

   Many of us have had this problem, so you're not alone. When I myself, started the Oxycontin, I had the same reaction...nothing interested me, and I went to have myself checked out. Everything checked OK...and the problem went away gradually as my body became used to the med's.

    Is this a long on going problem, or have you had a change in your med's recently?....if so give it some time. Other than that, I will let the ladies answer you're question. It is an adult conversation, but the members have done a pretty good job in keeping it safe of our minor members here.

      Take care,

 SE

I have been noticing this problem with our relationship. After speaking with my doctors, I have noticed it is for several reasons. Mine is not so much loss of desire all the time, but lowered interest and inability to achieve completion some times. For me, it is a combination of medication, hormone changes and my pain levels.
My chronic pain is pelvic and I have adhesions that pull organs and muscle out of place and in wonderful ways with movement of any kind. Add to it endometriosis, and growing my 3rd ovary on the right side, and it makes for an intimate mess! I have had a hystersalpingo-oophorectomy, meaning no uterus, fallopian tubes, or ovaries. The ovary regrows from tissue left fused to bowel and adhesions. This causes menstrual cycles, ovarian cysts, and more endometriosis developing. Right now my desire is at 0 because I just feel disgusting.
Then add gabapentin and fentanyl. Toss in some antidepressants and voila! You get libido or completion issues.

My advice is be patient with yourself. Work on it by talking to your doctor and partner honestly. Don't give up on yourself. This happens to EVERYONE, not just those with CP or medical issues.

Thinking of you. I am sadly at my limit of comfortable sharing on a public forum, but feel free to email me if you wish. Shyness is not a good virtue to have!
Good luck,
Mindy

Hey snow,
Because I have so much chronic pelvic pain the pain medication actually helps..add some anti-depressants and then there is a problem..

what libido???? hahaha- not sure if its the meds or just that i feel like crap all hte time...

Hello from nini53, so sorry to hear of your problem, as a matter of fact, just a few months ago, I asked the same question, and sorry to say, there is no good answer.  You might ask your ob/gyn if there is anything on the market that can help.

I am 58 years old, I have been through menopause, and have been celibate for yes count them 11 years.  No one is more shocked than I am at this turn of events.  I mean I am a child of the 70s, sex, drugs, and rock and roll.  It could be said about me that I was well a little ****ish in those years, lol.

So there is karma for you, it always come back to you somehow.

Good luck, and seriously check with your doctor, if they can make a little blue pill for men, they really should be able to do something for us.

well I might as well put my two cents in here! As a male I found that with the herniated and torn disk at T-12 and other disk problems at other locations, all the way through my spine. That the act it self, was painful, and completion was often not possible because of the pain. How ever I never lost the desire nor the will or the urge to try! My spouse at that time said she did not like to see me in pain, or to see that it caused me pain, and her answer to the situation, was to nolonger engage in the that activity. That decision on her part caused many many problems! Along with the other things that were going on in our marriage,....well it did not last! It was not the determining factor, but,  I definitely feel  that this was a contributing cause to our divorce. In fact I know it was, as I am the one who filed for it!

I do think that intimacy, in all its different forms, does help to bind and hold the marriage together. When one loses that, then as in my marriage we became like distant room mates, and that is indeed a sad thing to have to say! As I had once told my counselor ( I was going to marriage counselling alone as she would not go) ""If I am going to be alone, then I might as well really be alone!"" So after just more than 35 years of marriage we divorced! I do not regret filing for/ or getting the divorce, I do regret that it had to come to it in the first place! I hope that makes sense???

White Beard

Same problem for me. Most of the time I feel like crud and that really doesn't put me in the mood. I think when your body is injured, that is where all your energy goes. Sex is great and all..but it's not a requirement to live..like food, water, etc. When you are just trying to survive or "get through the day", sex seems like the absolute last thing you want.

I do have to say though...it's mostly antidepressants that kill my libido and ability to finish. Any of the SSRI's or SNRI's kill me. When this whole pain thing started I very reluctantly let them put me on Cymbalta since it's supposed to be so great for pain. It didn't help with the pain at all...only killed my sex life...so I finally stopped taking it. I think it did help with the depression a tiny bit..but the trade off for me wasn't worth it. The thing that was truly awful was that it lifted my depression just enough to actually want to have sex...then I couldn't finish because of this same med. NO THANKS!! Done with those.

Even if my husband and I don't engage in a lot of sex, when we actually do at least I can enjoy it now.

Stupid SSRI's, SNRI's. I hate them alll!