venting...

I'm upset.  No, more like furious, actually. 

 

My family doctor has been prescribing my pain medications for the last few months-- since I've started using them.  I have always used them as prescribed and have never had a problem getting another prescription when I needed one in the past.  But now, suddenly, they're treating me completely differently. 

 

When I was nearly out of medication last week, I stopped by the office for another prescription, and one of the receptionists told me I had to wait another two weeks.  I was devastated, but I didn't want to say anything or cause a scene.  I don't need to be accused of "drug seeking behavior".

 

So, I figured I would try getting by on just my other meds.  I figured it would be wonderful if I could actually function half decently without the use of narcotic pain medicine.  I really don't want to be completely dependent on it; it worries me.  Unfortunately, after 24 hours without anything for pain, I was a complete mess, lying on the couch crying because the pain was so bad I could hardly move.  I went on like this for two more days, before finally deciding to go to the emergency room.

 

I couldn't believe how they treated me when I got there.  The doctor was "nice" on the surface, but constantly insinuated that I was a drug abuser.  I was so hurt and offended.  Even my parents, who had come along with me, weren't pleased with the way I was treated.  Then, a nurse came in, jammed an injection of dilaudid into one of the really tender muscles in my arm (I wanted to scream at her).  Finally, without even asking if I felt any better (I didn't) they shoved some discharge papers into my hand (including a prescription for a three day supply of percocet) and told me to leave and follow up with my family doctor or rheumotologist.

 

So, I've stretched that three day supply out to five days now, and I only have two pills left.  I have to work later today (which is always like torture for my body) and I have to spend all weekend packing up and moving.  I just don't know how I can possibly do it all with no pain relief.

 

I called my rheumotologist, and she started me on Lyrica, which I am thankful for, and hope that it works.  Unfortunately, it takes at least seven days to start working... so what do I do in the meanwhile?

 

I called my family doctor's office again today and explained the situation to them.  They still told me no medication until Monday.  I have no PRN for pain now.  I am not allowed to even use any OTC anti-inflammatory with the diflunisal I take twice a day (not that any OTCs work anyway). 

 

I feel like everyone just thinks I'm seeking drugs to abuse.  I'm so emotionally hurt.  I feel like I've done something wrong.  I don't want to have to rely on narcotics.  I wish I never had to take one again.  But right now, they are the only thing that takes any of this pain away.  I am hoping and praying that the Lyrica works so I can get out of this horrible situation.

 

Waiting until Monday feels like an eternity when I'm in this much pain.  And now all I'll do is worry about how I'm going to get through work and through the weekend.  Of course, worrying makes everything worse.  But that's this little thing called anxiety that no one will treat me for.  (I guess they must figure I would abuse those medications too)

 

I wonder if it's just because I'm young that I'm being treated this way.  Sorry for complaining.  I am just so offended and so miserable I want to scream at the top of my lungs.

 

Monday, please come soon!

Thanks Rache. I'm only 23, and this has been so difficult for me. I guess I just took my good health for granted for so long. I never expected something like this. I know exactly what you mean about the way doctors and nurses look at you. Some friends have advised that I see some other doctors or try a pain management clinic. I might try that soon, but I'm going to be in a pretty tight financial situation for about the next month until I get moved and everything. Right now I still have some bills that need paid. I have a flexible spending account through my employer, but they messed it up, so I only gained access to the money a few days ago. A good friend of mine who also suffers from fibromyalgia as well as lyme disease was kind enough to drop by with some magnesium and vitamin d for me to try. I've heard quite a few people say that it helps them, so we'll see. It's just nice to know that I'm not the only one having this problem with medications. Thank you!

Lefty,

I am so sorry you were treated this way. It's so infuriating the way Dr.'s assume that so many of us fibro-mites are just out for a quick pain killer fix! Then on the other hand, you have Dr.'s like the one my sister sees (she has fibro, too) who basically will throw any pain killer you want at you and call it good. I am very worried about my sister because she has gone from a long standing Vicodin addiction (she was taking 3-4 of them at a time and chewing them..ugh!) to now taking erm..something stronger..but I can't think of the name. Oh, and she will also pop my mom's methadone like they're candy.

I'm not saying that you, or others here who take high dose pain meds, are like my sister-she seriously has an addiction and we've been trying to get her help, but she won't listen. However, it is unfortunately people like my sister who have made other Dr.'s reluctant to give out pain meds. They DO get abused by people, and I know there's been talk of the laws being changed to make it harder to give some of the stronger pain meds out to people. Again, I know you are not just seeking pain meds to get a high or whatever, or because you're addicted, but the sad fact is that there are people out there who do just seek pain meds and it's messing things up for everybody else! So, I don't think your Dr. was trying to say there's anything wrong with you, or that they suspect you or anything, they are just trying to protect themselves-and you!

That said, it is still awful that you're having to go without your medicine. I hope you make it through the weekend ok and that Monday comes super fast for you!

{{{{gentle hugs}}}}

Lefty,

I feel so bad for you!! I cant believe that for you to ask for something to take on a reg basis is not out of line at all. What are they thinking? Using you as a lab rat to say lets just see if will work? and of course its not narcotic. I'm taking double strength vicodin and a low dose morphine and there are days even that doesnt cut it! My doctor even said he would up the meds if I see pain doctor but thats about impossble. I wish you luck and low pain.

Karen