not coping

Welcome and gentle hugs to you. I am rather new here also, but you will find that everyone here is very supportive. I have often felt like giving up and whats the use cause it is difficut to cope. I have learned that deep breathing , relaxation, and letting stress go seems to help alot. I still have really bad days though, and I understand how it is to get worn out so easily, and the side effects of drugs can be horrendous at best.
Read up on the different topics in this forum, Fibro 101 is a great help, and I am sure some of the great veteren members will be along shortly to give you a welcome.

Hello needing help,

Welcome to the forum.  I really feel for you, reading your post.  I was just your age (and a new mom) when my symptoms started becoming hard to ignore.  There's just nothing fair about it!  I can relate to all of your symptoms, right down to the not being able to drink, or dance, or eat a big meal (I went to a wedding last night   and felt so apart from everyone else.  Nobody "gets it.")   

I agree with Angela about deep breathing, relaxation, and letting go of stress, to the extent that you can....though I swear sometimes we are stress MAGNETS!!  I'm 55 now, and aging is beginning to cause its own problems, but at least now my kids are grown and I have more leeway to adjust my time and efforts.

So many people have this crazy malady, you would think there'd be more research.  Well, we can keep hoping.  I look forward to talking to you more.

Debbie

Thank you, it is nice to know i am not alone in this although i wish u weren't suffering so much too. I have 2 young children and over the last few months i seem to have gotten more weak and ill. I am only 27 but feel 57, i just want to be well again. I already have moments where i feel scared at being 27, the amount of time thats passed, it's like i always felt 15 and then all of a sudden it hit me, i am 27. Where has all that time gone so now i feel like my life is slipping me by, we only have one life and mines is slipping by and i can't get that time back. I think i need to get put on anti depressants. I look forward to our future chats too. gentle hugs Claire x

Hi needing help, welcome to our fibro family. We have a great bunch of people here and we understand how hard it can be to keep going when our bodies arent working the way we want them too. We also know that it is worth the fight to keep trying not only for us but also for our families who love us. I know that sometimes it would be so much easier to just give up but believe me when I say that there are good times out there for you still. They may not be like they used to be but we all adjust. I like the saying we have fibro but fibro doesnt have us. One of the most important things is to keep yourself moving some everyday. Im not talking heavy physical exertion but just some mild exercise like walking or stretching and just do a little at first until you can work yourself up to more. I am sorry you are feeling so rough and I will be praying that you feel better soon.
Gentle Hugs
Shirley

Hi Needing Help and welcome to the forums. As you can see, you've encountered an excellent source of knowledge and support here. The members all understand exactly what you're going thru, because we're going thru it too.

I would suggest to you that at your next doctor visit, you ask about taking something to help alleviate the Fibro symptoms. Many of us here take medications such as Cymbalta or Lyrica or Savella with varying results. Also, if you're looking into getting started with an exercise program, AquaSize or something similar in the water is a great starting point. There's no stress on the joints and you can move at your own pace. I think the key with exercise is to make sure you do some stretching and gentle work every day...it will help keep you more flexible overall.

I hope you start finding ways to manage your pain, and I hope your doctors are able to help you. Feel free to check in here as often as you want, to ask questions, or just chat and share with others.

hugs,
Pam

Hi, NeedingHelp, and welcome!  I'm really sorry that you are having a rough time.  It's especially difficult when you have small children.  My kids were 12, 9, and 8 when I was hit with fibro and were babies when I got Crohn's so I know it's not easy.

 

As Robin said, it is very important to keep moving with fibro.  I know you sure don't feel like it, but it helps keep the muscles flexible and that will cause less pain.  You could have fibro AND arthritis, too.  I hope you are seeing a good rheumatologist that treats both illnesses.  There are some good stretching exercises in Fibro 101.  These you can even do sitting down.  Then you should find a gentle exercise that you can do daily.  I walk and swim for my exercises.  I walk at least a half an hour every morning.  Most morning I'd much rather vegetate than get moving but I know that, after my walk, I have less pain and also have some energy!  I think it's because I'm getting the blood flowing and the oxygen is getting to my muscles. 

 

You also need to pace yourself.  I do what I always have done even though I have fibro BUT not in the same time frame.  I will work a little, sit down and rest for a few minutes, and then work a little more.  It will take you longer, but that work will be there when you are ready.  Unfortunately the work doesn't disappear. 

 

We have found that most of us are Type A personalities...perfectionists.  You will need to try to relax on that, too, if you are a perfectionist.  You will only cause yourself a lot of stress and that leads to more pain.  You can only do what you are physically able to handle and then delegate the rest.

 

You need to find what works best for your pain.  What works for one with fibro might not work for another so you just keep trying thing until you find what works for you.  I use ibuprofen with food, extra strength Tylenol, malic acid/magnesium supplements and vitamin D3 supplements to help with my pain and fatigue.  I do the exercising and I also get gentle massages that help me.  Yes, I always have pain, but I'm in control of the pain and I'm also used to it, too, since I've had fibro for 23 years.  So, take heart!  You will find what works for you and we are here to help you!

 

You can have a wonderful life in spite of this illnesses.  I know I have.  I try to keep a positive outlook on things and look at all my blessing and don't look at the negative things in my life.  I can't change my illnesses, I have to live with them, so I use my energy to count my blessings and that really does help me feel better and causes far less stress.  I try to look forward to each new day with anticipation because I could have a good day.  Fibro waxes and wanes so we will have our good periods and our bad periods.  If the day turns out to be not so good, that's alright because I can deal with anything for this day.  I take one day at a time and I never project myself in the future.  None of us knows what the future holds.  They could discover what is causing this illness and have a cure!  We just don't know.  So, try taking only one day at a time.  Life is pretty terrific and your family will give you much joy!

 

I'm happy you are here and don't hesitate to ask questions.  We are here to help you.  I hope to hear more from you soon.

 

Sherrine

 

 

Once again i am stunned at all the lovely messages offering friendship and support. You have all been very helpfull and gave me some usefull advice. Just about all of you have talked about regular but gentle exercise so when my kids start back at school i will start aqua classes. I take vitiman a and d, morphine when the pain is bad, tramadol and paracetamol, sulfasalisine, arthrotec, omeperazole. It is a lot and it worries me that i am becoming dependant on meds so young. I haven't had much pain lately, it is the fatigue and exhaustion that is stopping me going about my usual things and getting me down. I think i do have inflamitry arthritis and fibryalgia. Today started off wierd, i was so exhausted but had to go out so i dragged myself out to do what i had to do but i felt so terribly weak and at one point thought i could actually collapse. Then i suddenly had more energy and managed to get loads done which felt wonderfull. One of yous had mentioned being a perfectionist, which is so true, I am and am finding it so hard to not have my house the way i want it. My family do try to help as much as possible, but they don't do it the way the way i want. One of you also mentioned your step son and i thank you for sharing that with me and yes you are right, children will be happy for just a little attention, i guess i just have to try and find things and ways to do things with them. It just all seems so hard at the moment but i know god would not give me more than i can handle. One of you also mentioned how wonderful life is which is true, i just have to realise this. I mean i do feel rotten at times feeling sorry for myself when there is people out there suffering much worse than me. I just have to accept whats happening to me and adapt to it and then everything will hopefully fall into place. I thank you all once more for all the kind hearted messages, it is nice to be able to vent without the worry of making your family worry about you. Take care and god bless x

Hi Needing Help,

Please keep hope alive. I was FAR worse before I was diagnosed and at the beginning than I am now years later. At one time, before diagnosis, I did have a horrible viral type illness that wouldn't quit - that gave me such severe joint pain I couldn't pull out my hair dryer plug without wanting to cry. Those days are behind me now. Over the years, I have slowly discovered little helpful things -- and those little things all add up. You will find things too. It just takes time. Please don't give up.

If your doctor hasn't checked your levels for potassium, magnesium and other things - have them do that right away. Many of your symptoms can be caused by, or made worse by deficiencies. I have been in the emergency room twice in two weeks partially caused by a potassium deficiency. Let me tell you, it can mess you UP. Magnesium deficiency also can be terribly painful - and dangerous. So please - have these levels tested - and even if you're not low, ask your doc if it would be safe for you to take some supplements. Sometimes what they say is "normal" is still a bit low.

Sending warm wishes and hugs your way. Keep hope alive.

Dear Needing Help,

Just know that u are not alone.  You have a tremendous amount of value.  Unfortunately the answers that we need are just not really known right now.  Rheumatologists can try meds but some of them work, some don't.  I was able to take Lyrica for a little over a year with great results (not everyone can take it due to the side effects tho).  However I built up a tolerance and the pain is back full force but man that was a great year! I had to go on an antidepressant to help with the depression....tried to go off of it but my behavior became very erratic and eventually I ended up in such a DARK place that I NEVER intend to go off of it again.  My heart goes out to you and I hope it helps to just know that u are not alone.

LIVNLEARN