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Posted 10/20/2011 11:54 AM (GMT -5)
Hello Friends ~

I started this day with all my cards stacked against me.  It's the 3rd anniversary of my dad's death, and I slept poorly and woke up early, feeling tired and crappy and sad.  Forgot to take my thyroid pill till just now, instead of before breakfast. 

Soon my tachycardia kicked in, and it's been going strong for about 3 hours now (I know not to worry, it's supposedly the "benign" type, but it sure wears me out.)

I have to see a different chiropractor today, because my usual one (his wife) is off and I really can't wait any longer, I'm all jacked up and in lots of pain.  So hopefully he will heed my pleas to be extra gentle.

A lifetime family friend, a woman who was like an aunt to me, died last week.   cry    Extremely sad about this.  Her husband did call me to come say goodbye, even though she wasn't conscious, so that's one silver lining.  Her service is in a couple of days.  I have no dress-up clothes, but I want to look respectful at the service, so that means shopping, which I REALLY don't feel like doing right now.

I've been fighting a throat bug for 3 weeks now, and a very painful genital Herpes outbreak all week. 

Ok, I'm done.  Had to get all that off my chest.  Thanks for listening!

Debbie 

Posted 10/20/2011 12:10 PM (GMT -5)
Debbie,

I am so sorry you have so much going on sad

You are entitled to feel down especially with how much you have on your plate right now. I hope the chiropractor is able to help with the physical pain at least.

Hopefully your tachycardia will slow down soon. I can imagine how much it tires you out. I have bradycardia (normally lucky to get in the low 60's) and when my heart rate even gets to the 80's I feel such a difference and tire out. In addition, whenever our heart does something strange it is hard not to worry. Sometimes I feel like my body reacts and sends off alarms before I can tell my mind that everything will be fine and to calm down. Really is hard to deal with "benign" heart issues. I am definitely with you on that one.

It was recently my the 3rd anniversary of my mother in laws death. It is very difficult for my husband having lost his mom at such a young age. We try to do nice things on the anniversary of her death and mothers day. We recently started looking at his old photo albums and he has found that comforting to remember the happy and good times. It's bittersweet but I think it helps him feel a little better.

I am so sorry for the loss of your family friend. I know how important some of my family friends are in my life and I can imagine the pain.

I hope the days ahead get brighter and are less painful!
Posted 10/20/2011 2:11 PM (GMT -5)
Sorry for all you are going through. Sometimes it's okay to allow ourselves a little pitty party and don't feel guilty about it. Just put a time limit on it so it doesn't consume you. Hang in there.
Posted 10/20/2011 3:22 PM (GMT -5)
Well, a few hours can do a lot!  The adjustment really helped - it's like a fault line builds up every few weeks, tightening up my whole left side, and the increased pain sneaks up gradually until I'm a mess, physically and emotionally (I won't even address mentally  turn )  It's either my SI joint or sacrum, sometimes both, and my right leg ends up shortening by an inch or more.  They say this wouldn't cause so much pain for a normal person - oh well - so what else is new.

Then I was shopping for something to wear to the funeral, and I decided that was stupid - because, as we've said so many times here, those who matter won't mind and those who mind don't matter....such true words.

Frankey, thanks for your understanding...I'm sorry that you and your husband lost his mother at a young age.  That must be rough, I can't even imagine, it's hard enough when they've had a good long life.  But good you've found that the photo albums help.  I wish my husband would look back sometimes....but just not his way.

My heart is still speeding, but not pounding as hard.  I've had 2 nuclear stress tests and been exposed to enough radiation to power a small planet, I think -  nono   so no more of that.  If it explodes, so be it!! 

Thank you, Susan.  Yes, these parties shouldn't last too long.  I think this one is winding down...

Debbie

 

Posted 10/20/2011 3:51 PM (GMT -5)
Debbie, I too am so sorry for all you are going through right now. Losing the people we love is so difficult...I'm sorry for your loss. I do believe we will someday be reunited with all our loved ones. The spirit never dies.

I'm telling this story...an experiance I had that forever changed me.

My brother Mike died 5 years ago of cancer....we were extremely close, as kids we were inseperable. As we became adults, we continued our close friendship even after we moved to differant parts of the country, we talked on the phone for hours and laughed alot. All our convesations were ended with 1-2-3 Bye Now.

When Mike knew he was dying, we had many conversations regarding death and Heaven. I told Mike that after he died, he was to contact me using the number 3 because of our 1-2-3 routine...He said he would try.

I flew out to see my brother and he died a few hours before I got there. I was in shock.That night I could not sleep...I was asked to write his obituary, so I stayed up putting it together. I managed to get alittle sleep. In the morning I checked my phone messages. At 3:33 AM there was a message and all it said was no number. I knew it was Mike :)

I know you loved your Dad with all of your heart, but he is still with you though you are apart. Love never dies.

I hope you feel better my friend.

Hugs, Robin
Posted 10/20/2011 7:56 PM (GMT -5)
Robin,

That's such a wonderful story! I would take that 3:33 the same way, as your brother reaching out to you. Wow. Some things you know in your bones, they can't just be coincidences.

True, love never dies. The older I get, the truer I know that to be. The friend I just lost did, too. :) And the more important that knowledge becomes.

Debbie
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