Terrible Thursday (ranting)

This has been a bad day.

This is the first day off of antibiotics after 17 days on them. The dentist wanted me to go off to see if an infection returns. I'm already on pins and needles about that because he's not back in his office until Monday. If I need help before then, my only option will be my g.p. on Friday. So I've been nervous anticipating this weekend. But that's only part of the story ....

Today I had to take mom to two doc appointments. I've explained elsewhere that I end up taking care of her to the point that I'm killing myself. In the second appointment, which was a follow up on the hospital stay she had the week before, she started having rapid heartbeat. They put her in a treatment room for 2-2.5 hours hooked up to an ekg and other stuff. It isn't a heart attack, or stroke. So that's all good - he's re-adjusting her meds and all should be fine again. However, in the midst of this, my stress levels started to get me. Add that I hadn't eaten enough today - making it worse.

When we got done there - there were tornado warnings. We barely made it to a local grocery store when the downpour hit so hard you couldn't see your hand in front of your face. I was driving of course. Sheer terror is all I could feel. I made it into the parking lot somehow. I dropped her at the door so she wouldn't get too wet - but I had to park. The moment I opened my door, it was like someone had turned the firehose on me. It was storming so badly that I ran as hard as I could for the door. My legs were killing me, but it was the only option.

Once inside, I started getting cold - I looked like I'd been dunked in a pool - I was that wet. We rode out the worst of the storm inside the store. My chest hurt, and I felt like I couldn't get enough air in my sinuses for a while. Not sure if that was just fear, or what.

Trying to get home, ditches that I've never seen water in were flowing like white water rapids. Roads were partially underwater - and we had to turn around a few times to find a safe way past.

My tension levels went out of this world.

Once home, the power was out. It just came back up.

I have so much pain and am feeling terribly sick. I can't tell if the pain in my right cheek is migraine pain, or if I should be freaking out that the stupid tooth is becoming infected. :(

This has been a monumentally bad day. I really wish this sort of stuff would stop. I guess I should try to eat so I don't get even worse, but I sure don't feel like it.

Thanks for letting me rant.

That's about all I can do tonight - is take it very slow. There's a line of storms coming all night, so I'm not sure how restful it will be. Thanks for being there. I just needed a friendly voice, you know?

Thank you, Libby. I really appreciate it. *hugs* back at you. I better log off now - storms picking up again.

So sorry that you had a yucky day. Try to put ice or heat, whatever feels better to you, on your cheek. I finds that it makes it feel better. Take some advil and take care of yourself. I had my root canal today and everything seems ok. I am a little sore in my mouth and tired from stressing and tensing up. But it needed to be done. Hope your pain goes away and try to sleep.
Hugs Lisa

That is a bad day........when I have a bad day I always tell myself tomorrow will be better and try to cheer myself up.

I hope that tomorrow is better for you.
Soft hugs,
Sue

Antibiotics I have heard remain in your system for several days after your last dose so you need to stop all the worrying.  You will be fine until you see your dentist on Monday.  Don't let your mind control those thoughts because you can take on the symptoms of things, too.  I know I used to when I suffered with a lot of anxiety.

 

I wish I had a magic answer for all of you that suffer from extreme anxiety.  I have been through that but learned how to control it because it was controlling me.  I'm very stubborn, you see. 

 

Chick, just about everything in your post was anxiety-driven and that is horrible.  I feel so bad for you.  It's a rotten feeling and the tension that anxiety causes can be causing a lot of your pain.  Really try to relax and shut your mind down or get it focusing on other things.  You will feel better for it.  Recognize when you start feeling the anxiety welling up in you and dismiss it.  Take some deep, cleansing breaths, blow the air out slowly and find something to take your mind off whatever is causing the anxiety to kick in.  It does take practice but it can be done.  I do hope you are having a much better day today.

 

Sherrine

Thanks Sherrine and MamaBear,

I'm not good enough at shutting down my fears and anxiety yet. I try. I brought along my needlework to her appointments, and the whole while her machine's alarm was going off in the treatment center, I kept deep breathing and doing more of my needlework. I am very good at putting on a calm face for those around me. Inside though, it is really hard to shut off what these situations do to me. I meditate and do deep breathing, I do believe it can be overcome - but I'm not all the way there yet. Living in my circumstances, it is a challenge to stay on top of it.

If anyone saw the weather channel with the pictures of that suv stuck in a sink hole with a bunch of traffic lights, that's the weather I was experiencing yesterday in the white-out of rain while driving and running for the store on foot.

The physical act of taking her to her appointments is always hard on me, but running and exerting myself so much physically was over the top.

My doctor talked to me this morning about the tooth. She left an rx at the pharmacy to start antibiotics in case the swelling comes up while they're all closed for the weekend.

Sherrine you should be pretty darned proud of what you accomplished for yourself. I'm going to get there - but like I said, I haven't quite reached it yet. I'm a big believer in this method.

There was a great episode of Scientific American Frontiers years ago called Worried Sick - it included a lot of info and a demo of the Relaxation Response by Dr. Herbert Benson. It included mri and other tests on people who meditate for their religious practices - and showed the differences in their brains, literally. They even studied the yogis of the east. It was completely fascinating. It showed me the power of this practice. I'm not there yet - but I'll get there. It is hard work, but so worth it.

Thanks again.

Oh - here is a link to the show. I used to give out this url a lot, but I was on a forum where people were more interested in better living through chemistry and they tended not to be interested in this.
http://www.pbs.org/saf/1310/video/watchonline.htm
www.pbs.org/saf/1310/video/watchonline.htm

This link is related to the first:
www.pbs.org/saf/1310/segments/1310-4.htm

Post Edited (TheChickenPrincess) : 7/24/2010 8:58:38 AM (GMT-6)