I'm trying to remember because it's been more more than a year now since my reversal but I think we waited between 4-6 weeks. I didn't have any pain it was just that I wanted to wait until I felt like I could control things. I posted this the other day but if your stool is thicker than you'll probably feel more comfortable having sex. If it's watery - things could get dicey. There are things that you can do to control that and things thicken up a little on their own in time. Wish I could tell you one position is better than the other but they all present their challenges! Gas can complicate things a bit too. The first time you may have some anxiety. Always empty the pouch right before. And once again I will preach the benefits of a bidet seat. They make you feel so clean! But I've not had any major issues during sex and I've neve had any leakage during that time. Good luck.