urinate while intimate

Had robotic surgery 5 yrs ago. No signs of reoccurance. I must make sure I urinate before sexual activity otherwise ther is leakage. It also feels like there is some urination when I have a orgasm sensation. Is this normal? Erections are so so don't think they will ever be as they were. I'm 61 and wondering if surgery was the way to go. PSA 5.0 Gleason score was 7. And was classified at T3.

You and me both.  When you find a solution let me know. 

Wife is sort of turned off by the leakage, but we are working on it.  We keep towels and washcloths near the bed as well as use the shower for some penile rehab.

We are both hoping that this goes away, as currently 'oral playtime' is off the table.    

I do not have the problem if I empty my bladder before sex, but I know it is common. My URO told me that if I had the problem and it was uncomfortable for me or my wife  that using a condom will help keep the bed dry and the wife happy.

Welcome Loafer,
Glad to hear you're doing well five years on. I'm guessing your current PSA is zero, and that's a pretty good way of determining if you had the right treatment when you can't actually undo descisions made in the past.
I have had plenty of leakage during sex and have not only leaked but also had that sensation of having a flood while remaining dry! My wife also said it felt like I was ejacualting. Strange, but then a lot of things are strange since PCa. (Like sleeping on a waterproof undersheet)
You definitley need to empty your bladder beforerhand, and if necessary go at "half time" too (pee in the shower or bath if you have trouble peeing with an erection but wait till afterwards to clean up.)
A few of the ladies here have commented that in a way it's actually easier to wipe up pee than to wipe up semen, so think about that side too.
Sex in the morning when it's been a long time since you've had a drink can also be better.
Woman on top now seems to work better for me/us.
And why not try a condom.
(And Tenpin, why not try a flavoured condom to get a spot of you know what back on the table)
Alf

Congrats on 5 years in the zero club! That’s fantastic!

As you can tell from the responses, it is not uncommon to have leakage during sex. I’ve had this problem to some degree, but I always make it a point to pee before, which helps prevent it. Fatigue and alcohol can exacerbate the problem. Orgasm associated incontinence is called climacturia. Your bladder neck is supposed to close at the time of orgasm to stop the urine flow. Also the bladder contracts during orgasm which adds to the problem. I’ve read that around 20% have this on a routine basis after RP.

There are a couple of options you may want to explore. One option, like knotreel said, is the constriction band, called the ACTIS band. It is put on the base of the penis and is supposed to be very effective controlling both foreplay and orgasm associated incontinence. The other option is a medicine called imipramine that has been used to help this condition. It is a drug used to treat depression, but a side effect is relaxing the bladder and causing the bladder neck to contract better. Ironically it is not as effective for men who’ve had a RP. And just so you know, urine is sterile and will not cause a yeast infection or a urinary tract infection in your partner.

Oh, and condoms are certainly a valid option, but personally I can’t imagine using a condom at our age. I would think using a condom would be worse than the urine leakage. Just my opinion of course.

I don't think that Oral needs to be off the table. When we are being oral, and Michael feels he is near climax, he touches me, so that I know to pull off and finish by hand, that way when and if he leaks during orgasm the urine gets on my hands and not in my mouth (sound like an M&M commercial) I don't have any problem with the leaking, but don't really want it in my mouth, so this is what we have come up with. When he leaks during vaginal penetration, feels the same to me as if it were c*m (warm, gushy and wet). So I think it really is just a mental problem, once you get over that, it isn't a big deal. Some women leak during sex as well, so it isn't just a male issue, and certainly not an issue that should keep you from being intimate. Original question.....yes, this is very normal and is happening to many many men. Just another reason to get creative and have some fun experimenting with your partner.

Susan