Need your honest opinion

Personally I would like to hear about the journey, especially his perspective as well as your own observations. This could be his legacy (or one of them). On another cancer board that I frequent there are occasional end of life stories that I read when I start to feel sorry for myself. It gives one some perspective. It may be crude for me to say, but it can make us realize that things could always be a lot worse... and pray that we are never there ourselves.

Good luck in coping with what inevitably is to come.
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I don't know about the "rules", but documenting that part of the journey could be helpful for many. It would certainly be of interest to me, for what it's worth. Denying that it happens would be disingenuous; it is the outcome we all fear. Occasionally here we are reminded that this is a real enemy we are fighting, a battle with high stakes.

If you decide it's too uncomfortable to do on this forum, perhaps a personal blog would work? You could post a link to it in your signature. Then, people could go read if they choose to do so. You could post an occasional thread to let people know the blog was updated. Todd1963 has done something like that to good effect.

Beth please do post as you propose. Your would be a thread I'd follow closely. There are many threads now I skip over - others might skip over this one. We take on disease and mortality in the ways we choose.

Best to you through all that will come.

Wilderness

Heck yes. It's a journey we all make one way or another. Nobody makes us read these threads. If someone doesn't think it's appropriate, they can move on to another thread. I think that it will be of great interest and service to many.

Tom

Beth,

That sounds wonderful. This site is for support along the entire journey from beginning to end. Unlike some others, I am not much in favor of war metaphors for cancer (although I do fall into them from time to time as well). One does not "lose" just because one accepts a situation. To me, there is grace and nobility in such acceptance. Life doesn't have to be all about fighting. Letting go of hope (and regret) can add a lot to a life fully lived.

Beth,

Yes please! This is a brotherhood of men that have been touched to ravaged by prostate cancer. We are from all over the world, and from all walks of life. I believe this will help many of us to further understand the issues of this disease and what one experiences.

I know I would appreciate it, difficult as it would be to read. I'd especially like wisdom that comes from knowing how to make the journey as easy and enriching as possible.

Beth, I would like to add my voice to those who have said "yes".

Recently an acquaintance of mine, Philip, was struck down very unexpectantly with lung cancer (never smoked in his life and a fitness fanatic) which quickly metasticised to his bones. His demise was mercifully fairly quick, lasting only a couple of months. During that time his wife wrote a daily blog which could be accessed by all.

I know many people found that very valuable, not only in monitoring Philips progress, but providing great insight into the end of life journey, something we all face.

I commend your suggestion and hope it will also provide you with some comfort in sharing not only the the hard facts of the journey but also the emotions which I am sure will be very intense.

You can be assured of great support from within the forum.

Best wishes, Chas

Dear Beth,

I, too, am so sorry that you and Gary have reached this point. You have been so generous to all of us here and I hope you will do whatever will help you through this difficult time. Speaking for myself, I know that I will certainly appreciate hearing anything you wish to share with us. As others have pointed out, no one is obliged to read all posts, and many of us will be hoping to offer you support, prayers and love in any way we can. Hugs from me to you & Gary - Suzanne

I know for me hospice is a black hole that I don't understand the how's and who's..etc. Learning about it for PC or any other disease would be valuable. -Ken

hi celebrate life,

i am so sorry to hear this and feel for both you and your husband. these decisions are not usually easy and i admire the strength and courage of both you are your husband.

you have been a great help and support to me in the few months i've been on this forum, and i will try to be the same for you, though at the moment i am trying to keep my mental health intact partly by trying to not let myself think of the end of life part of things. i definitely think venting these emotions and writing it down can be so therapeutic.

much love to you and yours

Dear Beth,

Documenting this part of your journey might be a meaningful legacy for you and Gary ... you've supported so many people here.

I'm thinking right now of other friends we've lost here on this website ... some of them didn't get the chance to share this part of their journey ... in many ways, it is left an untold story, in many cases.

We are all thankful for the successes and sunshine that we find in treatment stories here, every day ... but we are ALSO here to support each other through storms ...

I just finished reading WHEN BREATH BECOMES AIR, along with several other members of this forum ... the author was a gifted surgeon who became diagnosed with cancer at the age of 36 ... he left behind his thoughts on living and dying as a legacy to others ... at times, I had to put the book down to reflect ... at other times, I couldn't put the book down.

That book left an imprint on all of us who read it, I think it's fair to say ...

Your words could also leave a lasting imprint, as well ...

Keep shining your light,
"Cyclone" ~ Iowa State University