I was 43 when I was diagnosed with Prostate Cancer and after considering my age and the opinions of 2 separate doctors I had a radical prostatectomy .

I am 50 now , I can get erections with only testosterone therapy however, the sex is nothing like it used to be! The only way I can reach the big O is through oral or **********. I do get an erection sufficient to have intercourse but when I enter her the climax happens very fast and there is little build up and almost no release then its over and the recovery or refractory period is at least a day.

Of course I always make sure to satisfy her in other ways but I am usually left feeling unsatisfied and frustrated .

The closest thing to the big O for me is if I receive oral , I have some of the build up and it takes a little longer to reach the big O but the feeling is only a fraction of what it used to be and I have none of the physical involuntary contractions that I used to have prior to surgery.

I hear people saying the big O is more intense and last twice as long, well I envy you because that is the exact opposite for me.

Now, let me mention the shrinkage, I was always told that I was bigger than average, well that is no longer the case, I believe I lost at least 1.5 inches do to my penis receding to fill the space that my prostate used to fill.

People do not understand how deep prostate cancer effects men, (edited out, violation of rule #1) , I have seen 3 different urologist with no help , last year I almost had penis implant surgery but the day before the surgery I canceled it because, I can achieve a good erection and I started thinking that the surgery might take away what little sensation I have left . I know I must be a rare case but I hope by writing this, a doctor or somebody else may read this and they may know of someone like me that was able to find some way to improve or correct the mentioned issues.

I am Very frustrated and depressed.
Protateminus

Missing Key Value : en-US, 737

Billy Bob,
Thank you for the relpy and the info, I will check it out and.


Prostateminus

Welcome to HW, sorry you need to be here.

Sex after PC will never be like it was - too many changes, but there is a new normal you can achieve.

I'll add my endorsement of heading over to franktalk.org and seek out a doctor like Dr. Mulhall. Also Dr. Mulhall has a great book out there (Saving Your Sex Life) that you should read. Lots of good stuff in there that can help you.

Andrew

Prostraterminus,

Yeah, things suck sometimes. Sorry you're there. Hope we can help.

The word Pratoman may have been reaching for is "anorgasmia" which is a fancy word for those times when you can do everything but finish. It's maddening. It happens to everyone from time to time but it happens a lot more to men on certain medications. Prozac, for instance (fluoxetine) is a lovely drug that helps a man cope with everything but that. It has horrible sexual side effects. I mention this by way of saying that anorgasmia is a problem you can talk to your doctor about. It's a side effect of some medicines and there are a (very) few medicines that can help. Your doctor can tell you if anything you are taking might be causing it. He or she might be able to switch you to a different drug that doesn't have the side effect (bupropion instead of fluoxetine, for instance). If your regular doctor can't get any traction you might consult someone who specializes in sexual medicine. (Prato already mentioned Dr. Mulhall in NYC.)

Alternatively, it also sounds like you might have a premature ejaculation problem. It is similar to anorgasmia but the other way around. Instead of being unable to climax a man with premature ejaculation problems can't delay climax long enough for his partner or himself to feel satisfied. One thing that can cause it is the same problem with neurotransmitters as with Prozac only with the imbalance tilting the other way. Sometimes Prozac (which can cause anorgasmia) is used to treat premature ejaculation. But the advice is the same -- talk to your doctor and if your regular doctor can't help look for an expert.

You mentioned testosterone therapy; what sort are you getting? What sort of T level are you achieving? Problems with hormone levels can also cause this sort of problem. Something else to discuss with your doctor.

And finally, you mention that you get erections sufficient for intercourse. Is it just barely sufficient? A little bendy, difficult to maintain? This can be a source of anxiety that makes a man try to rush through the process before his erection fails. Again, something to talk to your doctor about. If you have been in the same room as a television any time in the past 20 years you know that there are pills for that, too. You've probably tried the pills -- it would be weird if a surgeon scheduled you for a penile implant without making sure you tried pills first. Did they help at all?

And, of course, as a last resort there are implants. They don't make you 18 again but they are way better than nothing. I like mine well enough.

You might try getting a prescription for Cabergoline. Cabergoline suppresses prolactin. Prolactin is not good for erections or orgasms. It works for me. From Wikipedia:

"Off-label

It has at times been used as an adjunct to SSRI antidepressants as there is some evidence that it counteracts certain side effects of those drugs, such as reduced libido and anorgasmia. It also has been suggested that it has a possible recreational use in reducing or eliminating the male refractory period, thereby allowing men to experience multiple ejaculatory orgasms in rapid succession, and at least two scientific studies support those speculations.[6]:e28–e33"

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cabergoline