Friday joke (Nov. 1)

The world's richest man is dying, and what bothers him the most about it is that no one in the afterlife will ever know just how rich he was.

He starts to brood over this, so much so that his guardian angel becomes concerned.

So the guardian angel flies to Heaven to tell God of the man's plight.

God says “Well, you know, earthly wealth has no place here in Heaven."

The angel replies “Yes, I know, but he's been such a good man, did a lot for charity, and ran his business honestly. Isn't there something we can do to ease his mind?"

God thinks a moment, and says to the guardian angel “All right, tell him I will allow him to bring one suitcase, just one, to Heaven. And he can fill it with whatever worldly wealth he chooses, and when he dies he can bring it along with him.”

This pleases the angel and he goes down to earth and delivers the message. The rich guy is happy to hear of God's offer, but then he starts to wonder what should he bring? Earthly money would mean nothing to people in Heaven, and stocks and bonds would just be so much paper.

Finally it dawns on him. "Gold! That's it!" he thought. "Gold has been valued throughout history in all places!"

So he finds the biggest suitcase he can, fills it with gold bars, and sets it down, ready to take, beside his bed. Now he can die in peace.

And he does.

True to the promise, he arrives at the Pearly Gates, suitcase in hand. St. Peter greets him warmly and says “All right. Let's see what was so important to you that eternal life and bliss wasn't enough, but the earthly wealth you brought along with you was!"

So the man proudly opens the suitcase, stuffed with row after row of beautiful, shining gold bars, and shows them to St. Peter.

Puzzled, St. Peter stares at it, and then stares at the man, and says “What? You brought pavement?”