Posted 12/14/2024 9:59 PM (GMT -5)
I have been a silent member of this discussion group for a few years, although quite active before that. I will be signing off after Christmas and using the New Year to make new start.
Unfortunately, my husband passed away a few weeks ago and I am feeling a bit lost. He was diagnosed over a dozen years ago, with Gleason score of 9, and cancer in nearly all of the cores taken during biopsy. Since then, he has battled two melanomas, several SCCs, open heart surgery, and over the past 4 years, Lewy Body Dementia with Parkinsonisms. He fought courageously and well right up until the end. I was privileged to be able to look after him at him with the help of Palliative care team, and he only spent short bouts in hospital or rehab, and that was due to MY injuries (pulled ligaments while trying to carry him etc. )
Right up the very end, he was enjoying a scotch at 5pm, and several glasses of red wine with his evening meal. He lost his ability to walk and I managed with a Sara Steddy to transfer him to a wheelchair and off we would go - out for a quick lunch, or a drive or visit friends. Then, one night, after a not so good day, he told me he needed to go to the hospital. This was astounding as I usually had to threaten him with extreme outcomes if he put up any arguments when I needed paramedic assistance during his many falls.
CT scan done in ED, and we then were taken to the hospice (I had made arrangements if this was to occur). Hospice dr suggested maybe he had about 36-48 hours left. He went on for 10 more days, and even rallied during a big horse race day here enough to sit up in bed, call friends in to visit, we ordered food and wine, and he had a great day (although his bets were lousy and we lost $20!). He lost consciousness the next day, and two days after that, without regaining consciousness, he died. He was in no pain, was surrounded by his family, had his favorite songs playing in the background, and slipped away at about 4 am while I was holding him.
Thank you to all the supportive members over the years. Keep up the fight. Good luck and take care.