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Do visual aides work?

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Posted 7/22/2009 3:57 PM (GMT -5)
rolleyes Don't wan't to be looked at weird but does visual aides work for anybody? Movies pictures? I don't want to seem crass but in the past I was very visual? Nothing seems to work yet though I have not done it Looked at anything scool Much
Timmy nono
Posted 7/22/2009 4:04 PM (GMT -5)
I was the same way very visual, if the wind blew up went the flag pole. I am now 18 months post RP and while I still like to look/watch it doesn't do a thing down there. Lots of physical stimulation is required to get any type of reaction. Hope this answers your question.


51 yo
RP 01/25/08
Last PSA 0
Posted 7/22/2009 4:29 PM (GMT -5)
Like most men, was very visual pre-surgery, but even though I did not suffer any ED, no longer have an visual effects. Things still look good to my mind, but not making the connection to the nether regions it once did. Any kind of real physical contact works instantly as before, so I guess I can't have it all.
Posted 7/22/2009 4:55 PM (GMT -5)
Sure helps in a crowded room of hot babes tho ! No more embarassing bulges ! (ha ha)

Ditto on the above. It just takes some time Timmy.
Posted 7/23/2009 12:17 AM (GMT -5)
Yes they do for me. I have a very beautiful & sexy wife who will do anything for and to me. We do enjoy visual stimulation. I enjoyed visuals prior to and after surgery thanks to a great doc and good luck. We also talk a lot during sex describing our favorite fantasies. Hope this is okay to post here.
Posted 7/23/2009 8:06 PM (GMT -5)
The mind is a powerful thing as is love when you combine the two amazing things happen. PCa and its side effects can be very frustrating however if you allow yourself you can find a level of intimacy that you never realized existed. Find the blessing it because it is there.
I finally gave up on trying to force libido and erections so I just decided to love my wife in a different way.
I love everyone here at HW and I realize we all have a special bond.

peace to all
Dale
Posted 7/23/2009 9:17 PM (GMT -5)
Dale, I agree with you 100%. The bond here I feel here at HW Prostate Cancer is unique and special to me, and I am sure to most of us. Our newcomers and friends seem to pick up on that too when they lurk with us a while. In the past, I dealt with all my medical maladies on my own, just toughing out things, but since I have been here, it is amazing to be able to think, speak, feel freely without worrying about what anyone else is thinking or doing. Hope it always stays this weay.

David in SC
Posted 7/23/2009 10:08 PM (GMT -5)
Well said, Dale,
After two years being shut down by HT, I have improved an already awesome relationship with Ruthie. We have always been very close, but in better ways. But I also understand what these guys are going through. It can be very frustrating to lose control over the physical intimacy.

Visual aids wouldn't help me if I tried...Of course, I'm just a Catholic boy who still has his fingers over his eyes since long before surgery...lol...With my T levels at a small fractoin of normal, I have subzero libido...In addition, if I see a naked or semi-naked woman, I would only notice the shoes anyway.

Tony
Posted 7/23/2009 10:22 PM (GMT -5)
Dale,

You really hit on a key change in my life. My desires have changed from what makes me happy, to what makes my wife of 37 years happy. Our level of intimacy has gone to a new level. Time seems to stand still while we are "romancing", until I realize what time it is and the old alarm clock will be going off soon.

It is a neat part of the PC experience. My orgasm is not what is important, even tho I still enjoy them.
Posted 7/23/2009 11:59 PM (GMT -5)
Bob D you posted:

"Yes they do for me. I have a very beautiful & sexy wife who will do anything for and to me.
We do enjoy visual stimulation. I enjoyed visuals prior to and after surgery thanks to a great
doc and good luck. We also talk a lot during sex describing our favorite fantasies. Hope this is okay to
post here."

Now, Bob D as to your "Hope this is okay to post here," I wish to make two comments:

#1. As Debbie Boone put it in her famous song:

You light up my life
You give me hope
To carry on
You light up my days
and fill my nights with song

Thanks for the 'hope' Bob D


#2. The crowd of women outside your door tomorrow morning are HealingWell prostate forum wives who have been sent by their husbands to find out what your wife eats for breakfast with instructions to have a double helping themselves. Mine is the cute one in the front row. She looks eager as she thinks the breakfast is a pre-shoe-shopping expedition meeting and your wife is leading a shoe sale at the mall bargain hunting class.

Finally, if anyone tells my wife why I want her eating this Breakfast Food Of Champions the fact she dispatches me with a blunt instrument should in no way alter the fact that I'm a PCa victum and my demise should be recorded as such.

And now to sleep, perchance to dream, of nobel deeds and jousts most visual and verbal .....

Sleepless
Posted 7/24/2009 1:08 AM (GMT -5)
Bob D,
Thank you for your candid post. It is quite alright and very on topic...

Tony
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