Posted 5/4/2016 11:21 PM (GMT -5)
Hello Keith Ryan,
Sounds like you're experiencing some of the anxieties, worries, and possibly fears that go along with a diagnosis. It's all part of the game at first --- restlessness, worrisome thoughts, and sleepless nights --- we've all experienced some of that, in some way, shape, or form.
It's a lot to deal with at first --- then, the dust begins to settle --- you fall into new routines --- and courage and acceptance come around the corner.
Don't be afraid to reach out here --- you've got a "Band of Brothers" right here, anytime you need --- we're here to listen and to support you as a fellow comrade --- we've got a fraternity of brothers here --- loyalty and friendship. Don't hesitate to reach out ...
Looking back over my shoulder a bit --- some advice that helped me --- stick to your usual daily routines --- don't let cancer take over your daily living. In other words --- stay connected to your family, friends, and faith, in whatever form that takes for you. Keep pursuing those hobbies and interests of yours --- don't lose sight of the things you enjoy most. Stay connected with the world --- the people around you --- and keeping busy does WONDERS for keeping the "wolves of worry" at bay on those dark days that can come creeping around the corner sometimes. Set a couple of new goals --- go on a weekend road trip --- get together with the fellows --- go golfing --- work in the yard --- go fishing --- set up a poker club night --- work a community volunteer project --- quite simply, keep living life each day !
Along the way --- build a support system, in whatever form that takes for you --- make sure you are closely connected to a brother, a work colleague, an old high school classmate, a clergy member, your old college roommate, someone from church, a trusted neighbor, your golfing or fishing buddy --- a person in your life that you can truly CONFIDE in and stay connected with. I've got direct friends of mine who now share in my diagnosis --- we're all about the same age --- we now have a bond of brotherhood because of our health diagnosis, but more importantly --- they are my trusted FRIENDS. Seek out those people in your life who will be there for you, no matter what --- they become part of your TEAM. Call them up if you have to --- get together --- lay your cards on the table --- open up to them --- confide in them --- form that bond --- we all need friends in this.
In my estimation, there's also no substitute for staying active and keep pursuing your social life --- a sure way to lift the clouds of despair. As well --- and everyone here will attest to this --- a bit of exercise in your life each day can go a LONG WAY towards wellness --- physically and emotionally. A stroll around the neighborhood --- walking the dog in the park --- some yard work --- or a stop at the local gym --- whatever form of fitness appeals to you most. My favorite --- a late night walk --- it gives me a chance to reflect on the day and to reflect on the value of each day. Do what works for you ...
If the blues persist over time, fellows in our shoes need to feel comfortable discussing that frankly and honestly with their doctor. Doctors will listen, and will provide solutions. My doctor and I have a strong bond and he has always said that if I ever struggle with the blues, he is there to help me with that, and that there should never be any hesitance to ask for help. It's hard for fellows to do that sometimes, though ...
Just wanted you to know that the fellows are here for you --- another motto of mine that I think might be helpful to you, since we both have been diagnosed when we were in our 40s --- I set goals for each day --- I stay active --- I reach out to others, and others reach out to me --- I work hard to keep my head in the game --- I have stayed true to all my family and friends --- I also draw strength from my faith --- staying involved in my usual hobbies and activities really helps, too --- and staying active socially each day.
One more thought to leave you with --- a cancer diagnosis is now one CHAPTER in your life's story, as we all admit to ourselves --- but none of us should let a cancer diagnosis become the TITLE of our BOOK OF LIFE. I've come to that realization over time, and thought maybe that philosophy would encourage you right now as you begin looking ahead, setting new goals, and facing forward.
Stay in touch --- glad that you are posting --- staying in touch right here is great way to stay connected !
Quotable quote for today from baseball legend Jackie Robinson, "LIFE is NOT a spectator sport." Some words for all of us to aspire to ...
Sent with my best to you, from a fellow "Brother In The Battle" ~
Cyclone Fan ~ Iowa State University