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Posted 5/3/2019 4:38 AM (GMT -5)
I am sure most have seen or read Alex Trebek’s interview with Robin Roberts. In that interview, he talked about “surges of deep sadness”. Those afflicted with cancer or addiction know this experience well. This is a fear driven gut punch that seems to come from nowhere and when one least expects it. Illness can be a lonely place and finding ways to stay connected is the key to getting through these surges.

Sharing is a key tool in getting through these surges. Having a confidant and being willing to lay out the truth about how one is feeling right now is a gift to self. While this will not change the fact that one is suffering from this illness it will make the moment, the present more bearable.

Another way is to create surges of gratitude. There is no denying one is ill, and we can look around us and see the many gifts we have. Being grateful is the result of taking action to look, see and feel the gifts in our lives.

Both cancer and addiction fuel fears of relapse, pain, and suffering. And the only thing we have that is a fact is right now. When those fears surge in, take a breath, reach out to a trusted advisor/friend and take stock of the gifts we all have right in front of us. Practice this and the surges will be less frequent and not as dark.
Posted 5/3/2019 7:08 AM (GMT -5)
What you are referring to is choice and mindfulness. smile

My mother was a felony-grade abuser, my earliest memories of are of her torturing me in various ways. My father chose to enable her.The abuse (mostly) ended when I moved out. I had PTSD, suicidal depressions and a temper like the Incredible Hulk. I was sure I would not live to see 30. sad

I chose to deal with that stuff as best I could and followed through. Now I am 68. I still have those issues, but I have decades of using "coping strategies" to handle them. Mindfulness meditation (as described on this sites front page) is key to getting a grip on the emotional aspects of this, as is 'being here, now', living 'in the moment' and appreciating what you have.

When the uro informed me that I had cancer, I was not shocked. He got concerned that I didn't get emotional, but there was no need. I did/does not make me happy, but - I am doing all that I can to handle it and that gives me a feeling of control. smile
Posted 5/3/2019 11:20 AM (GMT -5)
well said trail guy
Posted 5/3/2019 11:21 AM (GMT -5)
To me, it's both amazing and inspirational how most of the time, those with the most serious cancers are positive, uplifting and courageous, while many with just a whiff of cancer can be totally self absorbed, fearful and melancholy. Your journey is a poignant example, trailguy. Thanks for sharing it.

I've known too many with terminal cancers who rise to the challenge, shaking off the fears they are facing, not dwelling on the negatives, and teaching us all a lesson. Mindfulness, it is!! We are blessed with many like that at Healing Well.
Posted 5/3/2019 12:00 PM (GMT -5)
My comment is OT as it relates to prostate cancer, but as someone that is also active in the pancreatic cancer community, Alex Trebek is doing a tremendous service in getting his story out. My wife and I are part of a group that helps put on an annual pancreatic cancer fundraising walk here in LA (which happens to be tomorrow) and Alex has indicated he'll be there!
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