The loneliness hurts.

Sorry to hear it friend. Know that we're here for you.

Hey John. I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling lonely tonight. This is a tough time of year. Use whatever skills you need to get through the next few days. We're all here for you too. Hugs.

Sometimes being alone is better....

Because no one will eat all of your French fries or your brownies,
leave dirty clothes on the floor,
disagree with your mom,
hate your cat/dog/fish,
change dinner arrangements at the last minute and not tell you,
run your car empty,
wreck your car,
lie to you,
disrespect you,
undervalue your efforts,
misconstrue your efforts,
stomp on your heart,
hog all the blankets,
buy you a hideous gift and then you are expected to wear/use/display it,
lose your mail,
bleach your clothes,
not give you your messages,
wake you up in the middle of the night,
argue,
ignore,
cheat on you,
hit/yell at you,
snore loudly in your ear,
talk all of the time,
watch them die on you,
etc etc etc!

John there is a big difference between being alone and being lonely. I gotta tell you sometimes being with someone is just as lonely as being alone. You have to find the good in what you have and hold tight. Dig for a silver lining and death grip it if need be.

I see you as an articulate man who has a big heart. Those are two desirable qualities but no woman is gonna come knock down your door and drag you into the world.
Its far too easy to let the yuk distract you and chain you down. So right now, this very minute say three things that you have going that are good (its a great exercise and should be done often. And yes I have to do them myself...many many times just today).
So what do you say?
1.

Happy holidays, I know you can find some joy in the silly season.

I know no skills.

Hi John. You're not alone. I'm surrounded by people but im right here with you.

What's on your agenda right now? I have to now clean a super messy house that NO ONE offered to help clean and my heart is beating at 98 bpm which is making me so miserable.

Distract me!

Hey john,

I hope yr feeling better. I myself have had a rough week and feel lonely even with my family around. Just down in a hole.

I hope you get past this anger John. I hope you don't believe your words and you know we aren't lying when we say we're here for you.

In other news, my husband got drunk tonight and said he hates me and I'm a failure as a wife. So maybe John, quit feeling sorry for yourself and be glad you don't have someone hurting you on purpose. Sometimes being alone is actually better. Screw my husband. I'm a wonderful wife and mother, but if alcohol tells him otherwise, then so be it.

Hi

Sorry to hear you are feeling this way this time of year can be tough for a lot of us so we understand what you are going through and are here for you always.

Hibee

Thanks, all. My second family is in town and didn't even tell me. I grew up four hours away and their daughter lives here. We are of no blood relation. Screw them, too. I always make time for them when I'm their way.

My mother invited her friend over, so my Christmas is worse. His presence makes me miss my dad more. He has no one because he cheated on his wife. Why are we responsible for him?

Normal sucks, too.

Thank you. Next year, perhaps each family member can chip in to get him there. Or go to him.

Smooth,

Your feelings are valid. Grief Can cause a sense of isolation like nothing else.

It is like walking a tightrope...finding the balance of feeling what needs to be felt and worked through...

...and beginning the process of reaching out and moving forward.

Follow your gut and heart. You will know when it is time. For now...we are all here for you...your rag tag group of HW friends.

I don't know if that makes you fell better...or worse! :p

Either way, know we care about you friend.

S.C.