Anxiety ruined my relationship/friendship is there a way to fix it?

I've liked this guy and been friends with him for three years, we've dated off and on but it was never the right time. He reached out in December because he needed a friend (his ex left him for another guy and got knocked up). We started getting really close and dating but for whatever reason I made all the mistakes of a crazy girl. He was so sweet he fixed my turn signal for me, took me to the doctors when I was sick, and brought me soup and tea. Then I went crazy, I tried to push him away, freaked out after our first kiss, cried after the first time we had sex, drove by his house didn't see his car and accused him of cheating. The icing on the cake was when I told his ex who I was friends with that we were dating after he specifically asked me not to let her know destroying his trust. He then told me he didn't want to date me that he still cared but we needed to work on the trust issues together as friends that he wasn't going to date anyone else or sleep with anyone else that he wanted me he just couldn't trust me. For whatever reason I couldn't respect that and I kept pushing for a second chance thus pushing him further away. He started saying mean things to try to push me away, things that I knew deep down he didn't mean. we had one huge fight that ended up with me telling him I was done with him and didn't want anything to do with him that I later regretted. I asked him if we could talk about it and he ignored me and I later saw that he unfriended me on facebook. I didn't take this well and ended up blowing up his phone and getting his friends involved. He finally called me back furious saying he never wanted to talk to me again, I begged for his friendship but he just told me to eff off. I've tried to apologize several times but nothing's working. He's been ignoring me for a week and a half. I've never felt this way about a guy before and I don't think I could live with at least his friendship. I'm in counseling and I know if he gave me another chance, I wouldn't make the same mistakes. I didn't realize what I was doing until it was too late.

Once I have worked on myself in therapy, do you think there's any chance of making things work with him? I don't want to lose him forever :/

Sweetheart, first off, I don't like the fact that he told you "not to tell his ex" that he was seeing you. What did he have to hide? That raises a red flag for me right there. Big time.

Like said above, it is wonderful that you can recognize where you made mistakes and now you will know what you could work on for the future but yes, first and foremost, your health is the most important.

I'm 32 years old and I lived a very lonely life. Men never paid attention to me. I never had a REAL relationship until the one I have now. People always told me, be patient and he will come when the time is right. I NEVER believed it. I got so depressed. I felt I would be alone forever and finally, I started to accept I would be alone forever.

Then a funny thing happened. God dropped someone from elementary school on my head. He came out of left field. Now he's my fiance. I've been through some tough stuff myself. I couldn't trust him based on how other guys had treated me my whole life. I can't tell you how many times I've accused him of cheating. I even almost socked him in the face while having a manic episode. I even smashed one of our toilets in a fit of rage. But you know what? He has stood by my side from day one. He has gone through this hell with me, both the bipolar and the anxiety. He won't admit it, but I know it's draining on him.

What I'm getting at is it takes a very special kind of person to love us people suffering from mental health disorders. They have to be very level-headed, calm, accepting, loving and compassionate people. Not to forget, they also must be very patient. Keep in mind our disorders are hard (almost impossible) for others to understand who are not living with it as well or around someone directly with it. This guy does not strike me as a guy who can handle this. Give him some time and focus on yourself. If he wants to continue the friendship then it will all work out, but you must accept if he doesn't want to continue the friendship, he was only meant to be in your life for a reason or a season. Perhaps to show you what you don't need.

He's out there. Have faith and if you don't, I have faith for you!

The behavior is called "Self Sabotage", don't shoot yourself in the foot and try to run a 5k, Peace

Larry ***

I didn't sleep with him for three years. I've tried talking to him but he's been ignoring me for 2.5 weeks our fight was on 2/25. I tried sending him a few texts and Facebook messages apologizing, a Facebook video pm apologizing, and I even called him from another number and was hung up on. I'm in intensive outpatient counseling working on me. He's a really good guy. Heck I'd even say he's perfect, not one thing I don't like about him which makes this even harder. All my guys in my past were all too easy to find something to hate about and move on, that's not the case with him.